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when is treating your significant other to much? when doses giving gifts get to be to much

you're giving me

too many things

lately

you're all I need....

.....sorry now i have Kingdom Hearts song running through my mind. :D

When the person being treated feels uncomfortable, it's too much. When one party's ability to give gifts FAR outstrips the other's, it's too much.

In relationships, even friends and relatives need to talk about limits. Long ago my friends and I agreed on a "no more than the cost of a DVD" limit for gifts, and in recent years we've agreed to not exchange gifts for Christmas.

A good rule of thumb is to figure that the other person will try to give you a gift of similar value. If you know they can't afford to, don't go overboard because it can make them feel unworthy or inadequate.

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when is treating your significant other to much? when doses giving gifts get to be to much

you're giving me

too many things

lately

you're all I need....

Step away from the console, sir.

If the gift will cause a financial hardship for either of you, it's too much. Example: a college student purchases a brand new plasma TV for her significant other, and has $5 for food for the next two weeks.

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I think it also depends on how long you are with your significant other, maybe buying jewelry (the expensive kind) after 2 months of going out is too much but in a longer time frame would be acceptable. The point is not to overwhelm the other person with the gift. If she/he ends up thinking: "Now I'm in debt with him/her.." there will be a point in which you won't know if its gratitude (love) or obligation towards you. ^^ You should establish boundaries, after all If you give everything you can at the end you will run out of gift ideas.

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Another important thing to consider is don't do it unless you really want to. If you're gonna feel miserable after buying her that dress or that ring or what have you, she'll be able to tell right away and then you'll both be miserable and she'll feel bad and won't want to use/wear/etc the thing you gave her, which makes your half-hearted effort useless in the end.

And above all.. an abundance of nice things can never amount to simply loving, caring, and spending time with your lover.

Simple enough?

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Besides all the many good reasons here not to go overboard on gift buying, it might make the other person feel like their affects are being bought. The best gifts are free. My guy passed by some gorgeous, huge wildflowers growing in a field on the drive to my house and picked me the most beautiful pink blossom. It didn't cost him a dime but the fact that he thought of me and stopped to pick me a flower meant more to me than anything he could buy me.

Personally, I'm a modern girl. I like 50/50 splits when it comes to money ^^

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • 3 weeks later...

It also depends on how you both feel about giving.

I have no problem giving gifts after gifts and I don't expect anything in return and my finance is the same way.

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